and I’d give up forever to touch you

In the thousand or so years Princess Twilight had been alive, she’d never given love a second thought.

It just wasn’t for her, her life too much of a mess to think about sharing it with somepony else. It wasn’t that she’d assumed she’d die alone—not that she could even die at this point, anyway—but she’d always felt she was content with what she had: her mentor and family, once upon a time, and now her books and owls and friends and…

Her.

Her, who kept upheaving Twilight’s entire life over and over again, first by finding her, then by befriending her, then by giving Twilight a family of friends, and now by… by…

“So do forgive me for not simply sitting there and watching as some monster attacks the pony I love!”

It had been exactly two days since Rarity’s confession, and it was all Twilight Sparkle could think about, especially now that Rarity was there for the night, lying on a mattress while idly reading a book, completely unaware of the alicorn observing her from a distance.

An alicorn who couldn’t help but discreetly bury her face in her hooves, cheeks burning at suddenly remembering said confession.

Rarity loved her? It felt impossible to believe, ridiculous almost. Not just that somepony loved Twilight in that way, but that it was Rarity of all ponies, and that Twilight loved her back.

And she must because, as previously noted, she hadn’t been able to think of anything but Rarity since the accidental confession.

She’d tried to read a book, and all she could think of was how pretty Rarity was. She tried to study her new modern dictionaries, and all she could think of was Rarity’s diction and endearing vocal quirks. Anything she tried to do inevitably took her down Rarity road, and how she loved Twilight, and Twilight loved her and—

It was embarrassing to say. Honestly, it was embarrassing to think, but peeking at Rarity from behind her hooves, all Twilight wanted was to kiss her.

You’ve never cared about kissing anypony before! she chastised herself. And now suddenly you want to… Aaaah…

What would it feel like? It wasn’t even coming from a place of—Her cheeks turned deep red—lust or anything of the sort. It came from a desire to be affectionate in the undeniably real and vulnerable way that only physical affection could be.  

She wanted to bury herself in Rarity’s chest, to remember what it felt like to be held, to feel safe, to feel relaxed for the first time in a thousand years, but she couldn’t, not now and maybe not ever, and the thought was so agonizing, it was almost torture.

“Twilight?” called out Rarity in a sleepy yawn, putting her book down.

“Yes?” Twilight teleported in front of the mattress, alert. “What is it?”

Rarity smiled softly. “Nothing,” she said. “I just wanted to look at you, is all. Is that alright?”

“O-Oh.” Rarity’s smile turned into a grin at the princess’ sudden deep flush. “That’s fine.”

“Good!” she exclaimed, radiating so much affection Twilight almost wanted to step back lest she turn hotter than the sun. “What were you doing? Before I called you.”

“Thinking.”

“Thinking? Thinking what of?”

“You,” Twilight replied, and now it was her turn to grin widely, Rarity’s otherwise confident gaze suddenly evasive, her cheeks coloring.

“Ah!” Her eyes met Twilight’s. “What about me?”

What about Rarity, indeed.

“I’d like to try something on you if that’s alright.”

Rarity blinked. “…Certainly,” she said, and if Twilight wasn’t nervous, she’d have been touched Rarity trusted her enough to not even inquire what ‘something’ was.

Twilight was quiet momentarily, summoning her magic and gently brushing a tendril against Rarity’s cheek. Rarity closed her eyes in response, exhaling a content breath and resting her head on the mattress, enjoying the tender gesture as it continued along.

Time slipped by, Twilight carefully brushing her magic over the owner of her heart, wishing it were her own hoof doing so, smoothing the coat that looked so soft and so warm and probably was.

Stars, what if she was never able to touch it?

The thought became suddenly too much, so she pushed past it, brushing her magic on Rarity’s cheek once again, down her chin, and so close to… so close to her lips, so full and supple and real that Twilight was almost afraid of touching them because to want to do something so badly, so desperately, was surely wrong somehow.

But touch them she did, her heart burning when she delicately brushed her magic over Rarity’s lips.

Doubtlessly intended as a silly gesture, Rarity responded by mimicking a kiss, her brow scrunching up in faux offense when Twilight’s magic suddenly vanished.

“Excuse me!” she exclaimed, opening her eyes, “I was busy kissi—Twilight?”

Twilight stepped back, suddenly aware of the tears blurring her eyes. “Sorry,” she stammered, embarrassed, wiping them away.

Why was she crying? There was no reason to cry; she should be happy that somepony even loved her at all.

“Darling…” Rarity softly said, concern evident in her voice and posture. She sat up slightly, leaving behind her comfortable position, which only made Twilight feel worse.

She hated worrying Rarity, and she hated seeing Rarity worried because of her. She hated being a burden again and again, especially when she’d only tried to do something good. 

Twilight’s horn alighted with magic. “I—“    

“Don’t.” Rarity wasn’t angry, but firm, her hoof extending out. “Don’t leave. Stay.”

“I wasn’t going to,” Twilight lied, the teleporting spell fizzling out. She was grateful Rarity didn’t call her out on her lie, instead lying back down and patting the spot on the mattress next to her. “Silly. I’m just going to go through it.”

“I couldn’t care less.” She laid her head down, her hoof still stretched towards the alicorn. “Come now, Princess.”

Twilight let out a shaky laugh, granting Rarity’s desires. She stepped forward, settling down next to the unicorn, her crossed forelegs serving as a little pillow on which to rest her chin. Rarity inched closer, enough that she went through Twilight a little, their muzzles so close they’d be touching if Twilight were physical.

“One day, darling,” she whispered gently. “You’ll be free, I promise.”

“You don’t know that.”

“But I do.” Rarity closed her eyes. “I do when it comes to you.”